The Best I'll Ever Be

it's difficult fighting this strapped in roller coaster ride
trying to make the person in the mirror match the image inside
i'm so terrified of being forgotten i need to be held down
or maybe put down i get so scared the world's stopped turning around
it's true i'm a weakness personified i find all these faults
after a life time, it seems a lifetime, or what to do's and what you dont's
i'm breathing for air underwater learning how to swim
i never dove off of the sidelines i let the water slowly sink in
i hold my breath in high places and under the light of the moon
i want my eyes open all night but sleep always comes too soon
i don't want to miss a thing i shake i shake when i cry
the water's empty the moon's gone and life has passed me by

under the tired eye of daybreak we stop and we stall
i could be a freestyle poetress if i didn't stumble stumble when i talked
we dream of impossibilities like getting married in the desert
i lie on my back in the grass and find the morning dew so pleasant
i press these keys to fuel the anger that rotates into sadness
if we keep dreaming dreams impossible we'd never know we ever had less
i touch my fingertips to mercury and never change a word
i never eat my promises you just conveniently forget everything you ever heard
i drink deep from the water we find in this arid land
you like the shape the dust takes in the palm of my hand
our lips are cracked as they smile at the drop of the sun
we cool them on the ashes of what this day has done

i'd like to steal the cross from jesus and the fires from the hells
i'd run away to somewhere secret if you didn't know me too well
i bet the devil his own footprints couldn't find me in the fog
i turned for hours hours walking and i think i myself was lost
you're a lighthouse on the rocks you smile a hidden deadly reef
but i still enjoy the way your breath snakes around between your teeth
you know you could bite all of the angel's wings one by one
and before anyone could thank you you'd have turned and run
you skin is indigo and violet under the bruised and broken cloud
it covers you hand covers my mouth as i scream scream out loud loud
because it's difficult being strapped in to a roller coaster ride
i can't make the person in the mirror fit the image inside.